How do you choose between two things when one of them you can’t really have…
I was given an ultimatum today/night…last night whatever. It felt fucking surreal. Like I was staring down the barrel faced with a choice I myself didn’t even fully comprehend. The thought of losing out on something seemingly good for me…or something I’m so…in……..
…words can’t even explain…
I don’t know what or how this is fair. I’m not in a place that this makes sense. Why am I whining here…vaguely as usual.
My heart hurts…faced with the confusion of this task. Not to mention I’m SICK uggggh. Maybe I can look at it like a homework assignment…which means being sick lets me off the hook! No? Maybe? Kinda sorta not really.
Life. Man o man.
I’ll just stay in bed until this all makes sense again.