killing time

I imagine

you’re bigger in my head.

fuller.

but instead you wain out like a bad bulb

or a car stalled in the driveway.

It’s sideways

the fine way

I build you up

Up

only to watch you

crash

in the end.

And it will end

again…

solely because

you were fuller

since you acted

as a filler

to buy time

until

I found her.

Foolishly

my pride

allowed me to cloud

my mind

just not in time

to salvage your heart

from the wreckless

debris

I left strewn about

so shamelessly.

Forgive me?

Don’t hate me…

For killing time

at your expense.

Truthfully.

Regrettably.

I lied to me too.

I imagined you were bigger

in my head

fuller

but instead

“I want”

must be followed with

“let’s please remain friends”

time and time again

until I’m no longer

killing time

with your hearts.

Spilling turpentine

upon what they thought

was a mutual spark.

I imagine

you were bigger in my head

Fuller

Deeper

Wiser

Taller

Calmer

Stronger.

But I found
her…

Instead.

Photobucket

2 responses to “killing time

  1. Ah, such is the pain of love and life, but what would it all be without it? It looks like you’ve had your share. Congrats!

  2. yes indeed I have….from all sides. but I couldn’t live life without love…whether it bring me pain or joy. thank you for your comment. 🙂

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s